Just a note on men/women going to prison: I read in a British conservative newspaper several years ago that women in the UK were sentenced to harsher prison sentences on average than male offenders, for the same crimes. And first-time female offenders were more likely to get a custodial sentence than men. For the same crimes. The British justice seems to have frowned on women deviating from the norm more than it did men, and punished them worse.
Just a thought. I'm not sure if it's even true, mind you.
The relationship thing: I couldn't not talk about past relationships because I can't not talk about who I am. It doesn't suit everyone, I'm sure, and those people who don't like to hear their partners talk about past relationships hopefully find partners who don't like to talk about their past relationships. Me, while I'm quite shy, I'm not that private and need my close friends/a boyfriend to know who I am. All of me. I couldn't be in a relationship where I would have to censor myself over what I would consider normal healthy things about past relationships.
If a new boyf did things that made me unhappy like in a past relationship, I'd definitely end it as there's no way I'm going to repeat certain patterns. But I'm talking about major issues, like the guy never wanting to try something new or travel someplace new, and generally stifling me, not irrelevant but irritating things like, I dunno, getting a bit drunk every weekend. But some girls would hate the drunk thing and like the never-trying-new-things bit. It's a funny old etc etc....I think it depends on why your last relationship broke up and how willing you are to put with behaviour you don't like in order to be with a person that you do like. Wow, me wise. Me CLEVER.
Numbering among my special skills, such as stating the obvious as above, is the ability to just keep stating stuff. I almost always feel compelled to comment because (a) you talk about interesting stuff in an engaging way (b) I think of blogs as being a dialogue/conversation led by the blogger and (c) I'm very opinionated. Sometimes I worry this makes me look like a twerp. But I'm okay with that, and will continue to twerp up your comment section, with your leave. :)
Dont worry about leaving too many or too long of comments. I love that anyone comments. It lets me know that people are listening and give a rats ass.
You say twerp. Here that has a different meaning. People would call someone small and annoying a twerp. Very old saying. As far as the relationship thing and bringing up past ones, its a thin line to walk. You dont wanna be with someone new and talk about what a blast you had with an ex or how much great sex you had or something. That's just foul. Explaining why it ended is a good way to ensure past mistakes aren't repeated. For me it was when we stopped talking because as you can tell I like talking a lot. Like...a lot! So thanks for writing and I'll see you at the message boards!
Oh, I totally agree, talking to your current boyf/girlf about how great the ex was is stupid and insensitive, not to mention utterly irrelevant unless you're a manipulative jerk. But I honestly couldn't censor myself over everyday stuff, like if I had visited/went on holiday to a certain place with an ex, and I was talking about that place/holiday with my new guy, or my current guy noticed a book or CD the ex had bought me, his name might come up. However, I would never use the word 'we', as in, 'Oh I saw that movie with the ex, and we loved it'. Noooooo. Bad. And I would never bring up what the ex's opinion of something was. That's just commonsense and decency.
Twerp is old-fashioned now? Really? haha. Cool. We use it to mean someone kinda silly or foolish. I tend to be more wordy than most when posting comments, even on the forums as you've probably noticed....blah blah blah...
Just a note on men/women going to prison: I read in a British conservative newspaper several years ago that women in the UK were sentenced to harsher prison sentences on average than male offenders, for the same crimes. And first-time female offenders were more likely to get a custodial sentence than men. For the same crimes. The British justice seems to have frowned on women deviating from the norm more than it did men, and punished them worse.
ReplyDeleteJust a thought. I'm not sure if it's even true, mind you.
The relationship thing: I couldn't not talk about past relationships because I can't not talk about who I am. It doesn't suit everyone, I'm sure, and those people who don't like to hear their partners talk about past relationships hopefully find partners who don't like to talk about their past relationships. Me, while I'm quite shy, I'm not that private and need my close friends/a boyfriend to know who I am. All of me. I couldn't be in a relationship where I would have to censor myself over what I would consider normal healthy things about past relationships.
ReplyDeleteIf a new boyf did things that made me unhappy like in a past relationship, I'd definitely end it as there's no way I'm going to repeat certain patterns. But I'm talking about major issues, like the guy never wanting to try something new or travel someplace new, and generally stifling me, not irrelevant but irritating things like, I dunno, getting a bit drunk every weekend. But some girls would hate the drunk thing and like the never-trying-new-things bit. It's a funny old etc etc....I think it depends on why your last relationship broke up and how willing you are to put with behaviour you don't like in order to be with a person that you do like. Wow, me wise. Me CLEVER.
Numbering among my special skills, such as stating the obvious as above, is the ability to just keep stating stuff. I almost always feel compelled to comment because (a) you talk about interesting stuff in an engaging way (b) I think of blogs as being a dialogue/conversation led by the blogger and (c) I'm very opinionated. Sometimes I worry this makes me look like a twerp. But I'm okay with that, and will continue to twerp up your comment section, with your leave. :)
Dont worry about leaving too many or too long of comments. I love that anyone comments. It lets me know that people are listening and give a rats ass.
ReplyDeleteYou say twerp. Here that has a different meaning. People would call someone small and annoying a twerp. Very old saying. As far as the relationship thing and bringing up past ones, its a thin line to walk. You dont wanna be with someone new and talk about what a blast you had with an ex or how much great sex you had or something. That's just foul. Explaining why it ended is a good way to ensure past mistakes aren't repeated. For me it was when we stopped talking because as you can tell I like talking a lot. Like...a lot! So thanks for writing and I'll see you at the message boards!
Oh, I totally agree, talking to your current boyf/girlf about how great the ex was is stupid and insensitive, not to mention utterly irrelevant unless you're a manipulative jerk. But I honestly couldn't censor myself over everyday stuff, like if I had visited/went on holiday to a certain place with an ex, and I was talking about that place/holiday with my new guy, or my current guy noticed a book or CD the ex had bought me, his name might come up. However, I would never use the word 'we', as in, 'Oh I saw that movie with the ex, and we loved it'. Noooooo. Bad. And I would never bring up what the ex's opinion of something was. That's just commonsense and decency.
ReplyDeleteTwerp is old-fashioned now? Really? haha. Cool. We use it to mean someone kinda silly or foolish. I tend to be more wordy than most when posting comments, even on the forums as you've probably noticed....blah blah blah...