There was a small fire today. Not sure who started it but I was pleased with the distraction. You’d think everyone would be happy with such peace and quiet. I’m not. 2260 was relatively quiet but there was still some form of chaos. China had destroyed Japan. London has severed all ties with the rest of the world. No one had heard a peep from Africa since World War 4. But now? Everything was nice and sugary sweet. It was sickening.
During “lunch” I sit alone. Every day someone tries to befriend me. Today is a guy who says his name is Zint. These are the kinda names I have to deal with. No wonder I don’t bother to learn them. Everyone adds a Z, Y, or even numbers. There was this guy named 899. I shit you not. 8 fucking 99. I have to keep these thoughts to myself. That’s why I’m cursing so much. They don’t look to kindly on potty mouths. That reminds me of a funny story. In 2011, and you can still find the holovids of this, there was this news guy that believed that the world was about to end. They did a poll and 70% of the world believed that. Blame the Mayans and the media. So this guy, he goes on live TV right before the stroke of midnight and lets loose a barrage of profanity that would make the devil blush. Midnight came. The world didn’t end. But his career did. So, yeah. That’s why I don’t talk much. I swear like a whore.
Zint sits down holding his tray that contains a few pills, a tube of what is supposed to be meat, and a glass of h1o. Not, h2o. Don’t ask. He smiles at me. I don’t smile back. He looks like one of those damned robots. He pops one of the pills into his mouth and rubs his belly. If I say something I’ll get gassed.
“So how are you doing today, Rod!” he hollers at me.
“I’m amazingly bored” I tell him. He laughs. “Seriously. If I don’t get laid soon I may lose my mind.”
“Laid?” Zint asks me. “Are you tired? I can get you some Tanergy!” He is up and running before I can stop him. Tanergy is this drink that looks like urine, smells like shit, but apparently gives you enough energy to knock over a building. I refuse to drink the stuff. There was something like it when I was a kid called Number 6. Homicide was a side effect. Makes you wonder what Numbers 1 through 5 did. “Here you go!” Zint cracks open the Tanergy. Says it contains real fruits and vegetables. Bullshit. The last fruit or vegetable was seen a couple years before I was recruited for this nonsense. No one panicked. We were all so pumped full of bars that gave us what we needed to survive. I knock the drink over and everyone gasps. Robots come and get it before it has a chance to dry. “Oh, no…” Zint moans. “Should I get you another one, Rod?!”
“I’ll be fine” I tell him. “As soon as I get laid.” The woman in gold walks on by. The things I would do to her would get me locked away for life.
“Like what?” she asks me.
“You heard that?” I ask her. Fucking Sympaths.
“Yes” she says. She smiles at me. Maybe today wont be so bad.
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