The other day I was watching a movie and a Black character in it made it till the end of the film. I was like “Oh, my god. He’s actually gonna make it to the credits!” I didn’t know how to feel. I also spoke too soon because he ended up dying three minutes before the film ended. I mean, come on. As a Black dude ever since I was little I would hear people joke about how Black people always die in movies. It doesn’t matter what type of film it is. They will not make it till the end. God forbid it’s a horror film. Jeez, as soon as anyone of any race sees a Black guy they already know that they wont make it.
Its pretty much a given that Black people, men specifically, will kick the bucket long before anyone else. I started thinking about this and Cam pointed out a few more characters in films that were killed or totally dicked over so I decided to make a quick list of some of them. This isn’t some mission statement from me wanting Black folks to live more often in movies. But…yeah. It kinda is.
Who: Keith David as Frank in They Live.
This guy was just living his life working construction and fighting a secret war until Roddy Piper showed up with them damned sunglasses and started rocking the boat. He began kicking all kinds of ass with his amazing voice and fought his way through dozens of cops and aliens on his way to freeing humanity from alien rule.
Death: Shot By Little White Woman.
Seriously?! He made it almost to the end when this woman who was all on their side inexplicably decided to blow his brains out. They didn’t even show it on screen either! The authorities will eventually find the corpse of a very surprised looking Black man in the stairwell.
Who: Michael K. Williams as Thieving Hobo in The Road.
Oh, dear lord. This poor bastard. Now if You’ve seen The Road you know that its one of the saddest pictures ever made. The book is even worse. When coming back from trying to not die the father and son see that this guy is trying to steal their shit with his hobo knife. Instead of offering him some of their supplies like they did with the creepy possible child molester the father decides to make his son question his sanity.
Death: Likely Exposure.
The father makes the hobo strip butt booty ass naked! Now in this world it is always cold and there is pretty much nothing to sustain life. This hobo has already eaten his fingers or had them removed. The father could’ve pointed his gun at him and made him leave. He didn’t have to force him to strip naked and leave him to die. This is the worst scene in this entire miserable ass film.
Who: Idris Elba as Captain Janek in Prometheus.
Captain Janek is the best thing about this movie. He’s funny, bones Charlize Theron who was an ice bitch, and brought an accordion because fuck dolphins. He seems to be the most logical person and realistic one and is ready for whatever comes his way.
Death: Turned Spaceship Into Battering Ram.
Its time to get the hell off the planet when he decides that they need to use the ship to stop that buff ass alien from escaping. He could’ve and should’ve been like “Whelp, I think its time we got back home!” No. He decides to set the ship to ramming speed and kill himself and those two crew members who probably were very happy they were heading home after all hell broke loose.
Who: Scatman Crothers as Dick Hallorann The Shining.
Poor old son of a bitch has to stay in the world’s most haunted hotel with a family that looks as if the stared into the abyss all their lives. He tries to help the young boy cope with the ability to use psychic powers but eventually leaves because you know Black folk hate the cold.
Death: Axe Wielding Maniac.
He was safe! He was on vacation and chilling in a hotel and decided to head back to save the mother and child when the father decides that Scatman doesn’t have enough holes in his body and kills him. No one else gets killed in this movie but the Black guy! Does the killer die? Not exactly. He gets to chill in the afterlife where it’s a perpetual party!
Who: Carl Weathers as Apollo Creed in Rocky 4.
Apollo Creed was an amazing fighter who beat Rocky like a drum until eventually helping him train in other films. He decides to fight against Ivan Drago because I feel like chicken tonight. There really wasn’t a reason to fight him but he does. Dancing to James Brown before the match my ass would’ve been exhausted before the bell even rang.
Death: Punched To Oblivion.
On national television Apollo was punched to death. He didn’t have to die. Put the man in a coma! Drago beat him like he owed him money. He was flying around the ring and when I saw this as a kid I was a huge boxing fan. I knew that in real life the referee would’ve stopped it way sooner but not in this world. He got smacked around until he looked like Rihanna and then died. Drago wasn’t even arrested or nothin’!
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