Fuck. That was the first thing I said when I saw this story. An old man, Joseph Vallenti, celebrated his 96th birthday and his family got him a cake. That's nice. My birthday is next week and no one is getting me a cake. So his family got him his favorite cake, German apple, and he cut into it and got the worst surprise anyone could ever get. Rat.
He got it from King Kullen which is a
grocery store in Commack, New York. After he ate it he got stomach
pains and diarrhea which at the age of 96 you can only hope that
isn't the beginning of your death. Seriously, he's 96 fucking years
old. He has survived so much crazy shit in the world and a rat
infested cake could've taken him out. A guy that is dating his niece
said that he saw what appeared to be a tail sticking out the cake.
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| Cue Sad Hulk music... |
This is when shit gets real.
