Future Fail: How Come I Ain't Got A Space Shuttle?!

You know why Balok is laughing? Because its 2012 and we ain’t got no flying cars. Seriously, that is some depressing ass shit right there. By this point I should be all futurized. I know someone is saying “You don’t even want a cell phone so how can you complain?!” to which I’ll reply “Shut your hole, Susie! Men are talking!”

Plus, how you don’t know that the fact that technology wise we aren’t where we were promised we would be hasn’t scarred me? Maybe I don’t trust it since it lied to me in the form of movies and television and magazines. Right now all’s we have are monkey ass space shuttles that look like a nuclear bomb is going off when they launch.

Oh, its so awesome. *yawn* 

Yeah. Look at that shit. Millions of dollars going to waste because these things don’t make it out of orbit anymore. The fact that in recent years we’ve had so many issues actually started to make me question whether or not the moon landing was real. Think about it. That was in the 60’s. No one knew shit in the 60’s. They had just found out that the planet was round and that Black folks didn’t have an extra bone in their foot for fast running.

One giant step for mankind. Except them Coloreds!

They especially did not know how to get people to the fucking moon and back safely. I’m shocked they didn’t just strap some poor bastard to a chair and wrap it with fireworks. But let’s say the moon landing was real. That like 50 years ago they landed on the moon and got back safely. How come we don’t have our own personal space ships?!

Behold! The future!

I know that looks like shit but whatever. Its in space. A few people can ride it. How come Dante don’t have that? Why am I looking out the window and seeing cars with wheels on the ground looking all last century and shit? I want my own ship. I want this!

P-shew! P-shew! Die, humans! I mean...yay, I got a shuttle!

That’s right. Flight Of The Navigator, bitches. If you haven’t seen this movie then you cant even sit here and tell me you had a childhood. I need a ship like this to compensate for the fact that we ain’t been to Mars or nuffin’. And its not like this is gonna change any time soon. In 2013 there will still be no personal shuttles.

And you can continue watching plane porn.

Click here to see other Future Fails.