Fucking Florida, man. I just don't even
know anymore. 30 year old Sean Petrozzino has been on the run from
police who want to question him about a double murder. Yes. Murder
most foul! It is reported that he moved back into his parents home
after separating from his wife due to some financial issues. The last
time he was seen is in this surveillance photo getting cash from an
ATM. Police say he is a “person of interest” which is code for
“Time for a new identity!”
You may notice that he ain't got no
hands. He also has no legs. He got bacterial meningitis years ago
and that shit was a wrap. Police found the bodies of his parents
after his mother who is a teacher didn't show up for work. This guy
has been on the run ever since. There is a joke there that I refuse
to make. Police also say that he is armed with a gun. I shit you not,
I am not making this stuff up! I am amazed that he has been able to stay out of custody so far. He can't be hard to miss.
In other crazy ass news involving guys
an 18 year old named Stefan Sortland of Colorado was arrested after
stealing an ambulance. While treating an intoxicated student
suffering from seizures the EMT's come outside and wouldn't you know
it, their ambulance was gone. Could you imagine being on a stretcher
and being wheeled outside and the damned ride was missing?
