Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Good Vibrations Gone Bad

I saw this story and asked a friend if 24 year old Vanquesia Hatisha Lowe qualified as a Certified Bastard and after realizing that she didn't meet the criteria for such a title (mean, evil, dangerously ignorant) I decided to plop her down here. This Florida resident was arrested last week after she stile a glass dildo from a Spencer's gift shop that cost about $25. Lowe put it in her purse after opening it and skidaddled. She was caught at another store in the mall and at first said she didn't do anything before finally handing it over to a store manager. This entire situation is embarrassing.

Is it said in a police report that she didn't think that she would get caught. I would hope that someone that steals something has more confidence in themselves. “I can do this! I am gonna steal this dildo and get myself off with ill gotten goods!” She was released on $500 bond. 

Different sites keep referring to it as a vibrator and made of glass which in and of itself is a ridiculous conclusion to make. It is likely acrylic and there is no way those take batteries unless you make one yourself and like living in the danger zone. The acrylic type of dildos can be warmed up in the microwave which should make you look at your single female friends that live alone and openly talk about their sex toys a little bit differently when they offer to warm up a meal for you.  

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