Dolphins are dicks. I’m
sick of hearing science tell me how smart a creature that can lose its life over the things that hold soda cans together. And are these plastic things gathering in circles and attacking dolphins? I don’t know. What I do know is that dolphins aren’t these magical sea saviors people have painted them out to be. And how are they considered so damn cute when sharks look like just
angry versions of them. Seriously, have you ever seen an angry dolphin? I have. They attack you with those damned pointy noses. And that sound they make hurts my ears.
Those holes on top of their heads are scary too. What kind of creature swims around with their nose on a part of their body they cant even touch? Stupid animals. Oh, wait. They are
mammals. Isn’t that some honked up shit? I think its where they shoot blood from. Besides not liking these sea demons this blog was to point out how bad I am at drawing on computers. I used my touch pad but still. There’s
no excuse for such terrible art. I’ll stick with pencils and paper. And did you know dolphins wrap their penises around folks legs and try to
rape them? For real. Look it up.
3 comments:
Well, now I know an answer to the previously merely rhetorical question: who *doesn't* like dolphins? It's Dante!
Ireland has a pet dolphin called Fungi. He swims around the County Kerry coast. At one point a few years ago, it seems a girl dolphin was on the scene but he wasn't tempted away by her. The worrying thing is, he's been around for what seems like decades. Don't these things die?
These things live for a long time. They say from 25-50 years. That is a lot of time to annoy the hell out of me. And why was it named Fungi...?
He's been lurking for a long, long time. And most likes to interact with human women, for some reason (he just gave me a dirty look when I met him). I have no idea why he's called Fungi, I think the reasons have been forgotten. It's not a very nice name, is it.
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