How Thor Ragnarok Made Me Wanna Exercise

It all started with Thor Ragnarok. I was sitting in the theater and there was a scene where Thor, played by Chris Hemsworth, is standing there shirtless in all his Hemsworthiness. A few people in the audience gasped. Some whistled. Maybe things moved in pants. I just sat there and thought to myself “Why don't I look like that?!” Besides the obvious reasons like the fact that I consider going to do my laundry a physical activity and all of my hobbies require me sitting as still as possible there is no reason that I shouldn't look better than I do. Not a 28 inch waist and 60 inch shoulders like Thor, but just better than I did.

I wasn't what I would describe as fat. I was definitely not in good shape but better shape than I was a few years prior. My attempts to be healthy started late and slowly. In 2012 I started drinking water. When I was little I would drink it from hoses outside while ants crawled on my hands. In 2013 I started taking multivitamins. Just small steps that made small differences. By 2014 I was beginning to eat salads sometimes and vegetables. In 2015 I was close to 260 pounds (I am 6 foot 1 and it doesn't sound bad to be that heavy...if you're an athlete) and while still drinking water and taking vitamins my diet consisted of pizzas, pastas, about six sodas an evening at work, and a huge bowl of Fruity Pebbles with orange juice an coffee every single morning. You do not want to know how many calories that was a day.

Grown Ass Man Tips: Ironing

I love ironing. Like, actually love it. I love it so much that I used to iron clothes for friends, girlfriends, and used to make money ironing my brothers work clothes. What I like about ironing is that it soothes my desire to see things change quickly. It was wrinkled and now its not. Lots of people don't even think of whether or not I iron my clothes and almost none of them care. I do. I stay home most of the time and still wear clothes that have been ironed. There is over a months worth of clothes hanging in the closet. 

When I was first allowed to iron my own clothes as a child it made me feel like a sort of adult. I am not someone that wants the world to start ironing their clothes. People say “I don't even own an iron” as if it is surprising to me. Trust. I can tell you don't. I am writing this to say that a lot of dudes have become very comfortable with looking like hobos. Hell, I got jeans that I have bought with holes in them that are ironed but manage to not look like a bum. Ironing to me is like grooming (which I've written about in previous posts). Why would I care to leave the house with my face washed, my nose cleaned, my pubes on fleek, and my nails taken care of but when it comes to my clothes go “Fuck it”? Ironing is just another level of caring about your appearance and showing yourself that you give a bit of a damn about yourself.

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Why Isn't Dante Dating? The Cowering

This was written over a two three year period.

You should probably grab a drink. This is gonna be a long one. I've been trying to figure out when I became such a coward. I was listening to a podcast earlier today (Duncan Trussell's Family Hour) and the topic was running from love. Having a fear of being loved. Fear of being rejected. The usual. Now, if you had asked me before I listened to this if I were afraid of love in any form I would've have told you no and thought you were a silly person. But here I am hours later asking myself “What am I afraid of?”

Am I afraid of being rejected? Yes and no. The no part I can say quickly because if that is the answer then I will just deprogram myself and move on with my life. I have been rejected in many forms my whole life not just by girls I have liked but by family, jobs, and friends. But then there is the yes part. That part of the rejection goes deeper than I'd like it to because I do like someone right now. I have actively tried not to for the last few months but its been harder and harder to do it. Go to sleep, there she is. I wake up she's the first person I think of. And the reason why I am afraid of being rejected by her is that being rejected by her will not just represent being rejected by this one beautiful female human.

Its a rejection from women like her.