Hello, creep. Hey, boneface crawly bug.
You think this is cute, huh? Fuck this thing. You all know that me
and nature have a deal: I stay away you stay away. This thing decided
that it wanted to look like the personification of human death so
fuck it. This is a caterpillar that becomes the Pink Underwing Moth.
Cool name, dude. Probably made by the same person that created the
name of a fly and an orange. A lot of blank stares, “um...”, and
finger snapping. It can have wings up to six inches in width which I
don't like. At all. I like my bugs being less than two inches. When
they start passing that they are now a nuisance and try to look weird
or do cute shit to distract me. Or get pink shit growing on it. “I'm
just a cute butterfly!” it cries. No! I saw you when you was a
baby. It is like when people marry someone and they find out they had
surgery only after they have a baby that looks the same upside down
and backwards.
And guess what? It's from Australia!
Oh, surprise of surprises! The place where even the trees scream to
ward off humanity. They are endangered so I guess I should pretend to
care. Nah. Most weird insects will look like snakes, birds, or other
animals to scare predators away. This one was like “I'm gonna look
like a man's skull. Yeah. That's my plan.” Nope. So much nope. If I
saw this shit in nature (which means I am terribly lost, peed
stained, and sweaty) I would shit myself so hard it'd cause physical
pain.
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