I was talking to a friend recently
about marriage, having a kid, and relationships and how I have
retired from being in them and getting laid in general. This isn't a
difficult decision if you live the lifestyle I do. It turns out that
I'm more behind on the times than I thought. There are moments where
I learn something new that I believed that I was well aware of. This
time I am talking about bases. You know, like, when people say “Oh,
I got to third base with her!” That thing. It turns out that I was
sadly mistaken in regards with what action matched each base. Check
this out.
“First base – mouth-to-mouth
kissing, especially French kissing”
I thought first base was holding hands
and hugging! Kissing is first base?! I went on a date years ago and
kissed her on the cheek. What is that called, a foul ball? So right
from the start this isn't looking good for me.
“Second base – touching or kissing
the breasts or other erogenous zones; can be either clothed or not
clothed; manual stimulation of the genitals”
Whoa! I thought this was the next base!
Grabbing tits is second base? What is third base? Anal?! Jeezum Crow.
This is seriously surprising to me.
