Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Story Behind The Photo 18

The other day was my late brother Kevin's birthday. I've written quite a but about him because fuck you I loved him and he was cool. This is a picture I took today of these shirts that were made after he died. Even till this day I have not worn it and I have two. Not sure how I got two but there you go. They look weird. Its just his head floating in the ether with the year he was born and died there. It always seemed so depressing to me. When I die I want people to wear a shirt with me looking all spry and jumping in the air or something. Not just my head. Someone needs to let my mother know this so I don't end up an even more vengeful spirit.

I have never been huge into ceremony. Having to do all kinds of salutes and wait turns and such has never appealed to me. My brother's funeral was the first one I've ever been to and we ended up having two of them because the mausoleum he was being placed in wasn't finished being built. So the next image is from funeral part two.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Rosscast Episode 282: Damn Pop Tarts

In this episode I talk about my weekend, pork chops, Only In Florida involving, surprise!, a woman attacking her man, Bad Parent Of The Week with cops and Pop Tarts, and Shit Just Got Real with a naked girl, nature, and hiking. Audio issues at the end makes it sound kinda crumbly so sorry for that. Click here for this and previous Rosscast Shows. Enjoy!

Friday, May 24, 2013

Sonic The Hedgehog Is Felix The Cat

When I was little and we'd go and pick my mother up from work we would go past this Chevrolet dealership that had this giant Felix the Cat as their pitchman. Not really sure why. Its not like when I think of cars I picture a crazy ass cat that has a purse that he can pull anything out of. I wasn't a huge fan or anything but I liked seeing it whenever we drove by.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Rosscast Episode 281: I Fart In Your General Direction

In this episode I talk about my fun weekend relaxing (or my version of it), getting cereal, movie spoilers, get interrupted by a Black pirate named Fabion, and discuss two Only In Florida stories involving a fart turning into a knife fight and an alligator foiling an escape. Click here to download this and previous Rosscast Shows. Enjoy!

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Parents Failing Hard 4

I think the state of Texas is getting pissed off that Florida has been hogging all the crazy and bad decision making. If you had a kid, let’s say a little boy about 14 years old, and he was shot. What would you do? Surely you would rush to the hospital and get that bullet removed or at least make sure you kid didn’t bleed out. Nope. Not if you’re Deborah Tagle of Santa Fe, Texas! If you’re her you head straight to the internet!

Tagle could be charged with a felony for waiting a while to take her son to the hospital after he was shot because he and his friend decided that guns were fun and something you should be aiming at one another. So moments later he was shot in the thigh because he didn’t have enough holes in his body and liked to whistle when he ran. So he let his mom know and she ran to WebMD to see what she should do.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Dante Bitches About Maxim Hot 100 2013

Once again Maxim has released their Hot 100 list. And of course I disagree with this nonsense. Now before I rage I know that this list is a joke. It has to be. These people slap together this list a day or two before it is set to be published and we’re supposed to take it seriously. It’s a joke. Ha. Funny list this is. As I look at a lot of the names on here it is a pedophiles wet dream. When did looking like a woman go out of style? Where's there some meeting that I missed? Because I didn't get the memo!

Monday, May 6, 2013

Rosscast Episode 280: Man Bites Dog

In this episode I talk about the rainy weather, my weekend, a Shit Just Got Real featuring a dog biting a woman’s nose off, a Dude What The Fuck? with a woman tearing her man’s nuts, and Tha O Show featuring special guest Pretty Ricky of Doom Mates fame…meaning my fame on my site. Click here to download this and previous Rosscast Shows. Enjoy!

Click here for my Funny Or Die page.

Click here for Tha O Show.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Dante Bitches About People Magazine Most Beautiful Woman

I hate when there is a list or something that says that this person is the best or hottest or whatever alive. Its automatically bullshit. I know they didn't find every living person and make a chart and talked it over with millions of people to find who the true winner was. So when People Magazine came out with their Most Beautiful Woman Alive I sighed heavily and tucked my penis between my legs because I knew it wouldn't be needed. Especially when I saw that the winner was Gwenyth Paltrow. Of all the women on the globe she is who was picked?

I'm as excited about Iron Man 3 as the next man, but come the fuck on. Its not as if this woman has been in a ton of amazing films. Let's not go based on looks. I'm gonna pretend I'm not shallow for a moment. She broke Brad Pitt’s heart years ago. Then she dated Ben Affleck. Then…wait. Maybe her vajayjay has something in it that helps careers. Well, not hers.

Rosscast Episode 279: Choppy Choppy Blendy Blendy

In this episode I talk about Spiderman stealing money on Hollywood Blvd., Bad Parent Of The Week who may be the worst parent to ever exist, and a Bitches Be Crazy follow up to a woman chopping and blending her husbands penis. Click here to download this and previous Rosscast Shows. Enjoy!