Dante Bought A New Comb

Yesterday I went to get a haircut. The barber I used last year and once this year was not returning my calls so I went to this other barbershop on La Brea called Trendsetters. After making it home and being beyond pleased with my haircut I had to sit and wait for my new comb. I know that sounds weird. Last year I started using this sponge brush. It worked great but after a while it gets whatever you put in your hair all in it and starts to fall apart leaving little pieces of sponge in your hair. The last time I used it and later combed my hair out I noticed how much was falling out. I wondered if there was some new version of it or a new product.

I ended up finding this thing called a Twist It Up comb. It did not look like a comb. Look at it. It looks like a small tennis racket. I ordered it on Amazon along with Red One Aqua Hair Wax. Everyone said it smelled like red Kool Aid. It arrived today and I needed to know if this damned thing worked as well as it did in the countless terrible, annoying, carbon copy videos I watched on Youtube. Seriously. Videos where Black people are showing hair products are 90% bullshit and trying to be funny. They not. I watched a video that was 18 minutes long and the guy only used the brush in the last two goddamn minutes. Unacceptable! But...I did see a bunch of fine ass women with short hair using this. I watched one where she tried it out but added so many products beforehand that it did not work and she decided to keep using the sponge brush.

So I opened my package (giggity) and started using this. In a minute it already started working. I was watching this happen and being shocked. I then added a little bit of the Red One and started using the comb some more. Hell, I am using it every few minutes now because it feels good and keeps making my hair curlier. The Red One smells nice and it not as powerful smelling as folks said in reviews. It is not sticky feeling and my hair can still move. I expected it to be stiff. I do not know what type of hair I have. It is like cat hair unless I use vitamin E oil as soon as I start growing it. I used to use gels that hardened and mousses to get the look I wanted but knew that shit was bad in the long run. I also cut my hair on a whim. I want to keep growing it now so I am glad I got this Twist It Up comb. I can wash it. I can take it with me. Seriously. This was a great purchase.

Grown Ass Man Tips: Females

The word “female” never made it into my vocabulary. There are a lot of words that thankfully never snuck in. It also helps that I didn't start cursing until I was 22. I was listening to a podcast and this guy kept saying the word female and it sounded so weird and each time he said it I would think “Dude, cut that out.” This is not me virtue signaling. Just pointing out that some words bug people an usually because of the context. I use words like lady, woman, women folk, and chicks. Chicks has slowly begun to be replaced by any of those other words. But female never made its way in. If you hear someone use the word it is almost never in a way considered good. “This female said...” “All these females be...” “That place is full of females...” The only time it sounds not weird is when it is added to an occupation such as female cop, female firefighter, or female doctor. The word “male” sounds weird to me unless someone is talking about a wild animal. If some dude told me he had a lot of female friends I translate that to “I have a lot of people as friends...that I wanna bone down.” That's on me.

Even women use the word female against one another. It's a strange weapon to use. I know when there are words that suddenly are not okay to say anymore or words that you are told are not cool to say it is an odd feeling. You have so many questions. There are some words that were so okay to say back in the 80's that I had to let go of. If you have trouble letting go of particular words you need to wonder why and when you use those words and actually do research as to why those words make people feel like shit. That is pretty much why certain words stop circulating. They make people feel shitty and you shouldn't pride yourself on making people feel shitty. I know it is a cool thing these days to make people feel shitty online. Listen. I get it. Sometimes meaning most of the time it feels like you are being told to stop saying or doing something because it hurts the feelings of someone. Chances are you are using those words because you don't like the person you are using them against. Spend that time thinking of something you enjoy instead.

Click here for previous Grown Ass Man Tips.

Just Talking With Dante Episode 40

“The internet is like 80% for masturbating, and 10% for getting mad, and the other 10% to get depressed. ”

In this episode I talk about my past week, getting a new plant, bitch about Netflix, bacon fighting back, Craigslist Rants And Raves, Missed Connections, and some Dear Abby advice that makes me shout. Click here for previous episodes.

Just Talking With Dante Episode 39

“If you have a big package you shouldn't say that...unless its frightening.”

In this episode I catch you up with my week, a dude that thinks he was being chased by snakes and zombies, Liam Neeson roams the streets looking to kill Black men, 21 Savage possibly being deported, Demi Lovato catching all the hell, a church leader thinking god would protect him from lions, a guy gets arrested with an odd penis tattoo, get mad at Missed Connections grammar, and a lot of Dear Abby reading that makes me lose my mind. Click here for previous episodes.

Dante Gets Curious: Men Vs Women

There was a video that came out last week of this dude laying out two women with haymakers. At the time the guy was not caught but as of a day or so he had turned himself in. His name is Arka Oroojian. When I was talking to a friend about this video I said “I wonder what led up to this moment.” Not even kind of defending this big ass dude for knocking out two women. But I knew that it did not go from zero to sixty as it was being portrayed because I know how humans work. The video that went around started with this guy hitting these women and not quite running away. It was definitely not a run. A saunter maybe but not a run. There were a lot of people around and no one jumped in to help. Someone recorded the whole thing and even filmed him getting away.

Something about the video bothered me. Yes, seeing two women knocked out not in a UFC cage was one. Also the fact that no one helped. I was bothered by that but I understand why they did not. More on that later. Arka (which is way faster for me to type) said in an interview “I definitely feel bad...I wish they didn't spit on me or attack me.” Uh-oh. Plot twist. So he is saying that before the video started that he was attacked. This is what I meant by something not feeling right when I watched the video. I could not imagine people getting upset at someone for taking too long to get a hot dog to punches. I could easily imagine a woman or two bowing up to a guy because that shit happens. It happens more now or is just seen more now because everyone films everything.