Nature
is an asshole. Seriously. I read about these crazy ass hornets in
Asia, specifically China, that are just wrecking shop everywhere they
go. Regular hornets suck. They build nests and start to attack you if
you get too close to it. They're like those bad kids in that house up
the street. Fuck them, too. Normal hornets are the size of a bee.
Sometimes people go “Is that a bee or a hornet? Either way let's
get out of here!”
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Poke it with a stick and see if they buzz or hum. |
Not
these Chinese hornets aka V Mandarinia. You see one of these and
you'll probably think its not even real. “Am I in The Matrix?!”
I'd probably scream before getting a few dozen new holes in my body.
What's so bad about these, you ask? First off, they're the world's
largest hornet and I'm just now finding out about them. The world's
largest anything is bad. Burger. Tumor. Penis. All bad. Also, its
venom is strong enough to melt human skin. They, meaning “science”,
say dissolve but lets not split hairs. People can also die of kidney
failure and anaphylactic shock.