Ew. 42 year old Christopher Mitchell
who stands at 5'6” and weighs 450 pounds (32 stone to my foreign
readers) was arrested after it was discovered that he was hiding weed
in his fat rolls. During a traffic stop police pulled Mitchell's
driver buddy Keithian Roberts over because Mitchell did not have a
seat belt on. Yeah. I'm sure that's why the initial stop occurred.
Mitchell said that he was too big for the seat belt. Police say they
both got nervous so the police called in the drug dog. Of course they
are nervous! They're Black and live in Florida!
 |
| You gon' eat yo cornbread...? |
They ended up finding 23 grams of weed
in his fat, $7000, a gun, and some cocaine. I don't think the rest of
that stuff was found on the fat rolls but you never know. 450 pounds
provides a lot of hiding places. Police also found a shit ton of
carpet freshener and dryer sheets on the trunk which is apparently
used to disguise the smell of weed. Nothing hides the smell of weed.
Let me just put that out there. If you get high at work all you
co-workers know. You're not fooling anyone. They just haven't told on
you yet.
