Every once in a while I will see a news story and pause thinking that I am just not reading it right. Like, it can't say what it looks like it says because if it does that means that I'm not building my spaceship fast enough to get the fuck off of this planet. There's this kid, 18, who goes by the name VersacePockets who has been banned from Vine because of his fuckery.
He was dared to have sex with a Hot
Pocket and decided that he would. On the video you can see his face
perfectly well even though he wants to remain anonymous. He has had
the sex with other food but his antics with Hot Pockets got his ass
blocked by that company's Twitter page as well as Twitter and Vine.
“I just thought it was so fuckin' funny” he said in an interview
on First We Feast. Thank god this shit didn't exist while I was
growing up.
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| He took the tag line literally. |
“I tried doing it without a condom
and it was just, like, way too hot. I put it in the fridge for a
little bit and I was like, 'Dude, I'm gonna have to use a condom if
I'm gonna actually stick my dick in the whole Hot Pocket.'” The
worst part about this crap is that he works around food. I personally
don't want to know that the kid making my food spends his free time
fucking it and posting videos and pictures of it.
