Salad Tossing For Freedom

This 52 year old lady from Louisiana was arrested for first being violent then being nasty. Well, its nasty because we know what she did but if this happened in her bedroom she'd be a champion. Diane Thomas was arrested after she beat up her boyfriend. By the way, if you're that age and have a “boyfriend” you both better have an agreement that marriage is garbage or just accept the fact that you two are roommates. When the cops showed up and the boyfriend had scratches all over him she told cops that her man was a bitch that he got in her face so she “beat his ass.” She also told cops that she couldn't go to jail because she “has a good job.” Then she took things to Freaky Town.

As she was handcuffed she told the officer “If you won't take me to jail I will get on my knees right now. Officer I will even lick your butt hole.” Now...this is why I'm not a cop. Why? Because I would have taken her up on her offer. I know I'm terrible! She was charged with misdemeanor domestic abuse and then felony bribery. She made the $5,000 bond and is back on the streets with the world knowing she is willing to toss salad to not go to jail.  

Dumb Teacher Does Dumb Thing

This goes along with me saying that the people that hurt the passage of marijuana laws in this country are the ones that enjoy it the most. A high school teacher in Louisiana, 29 year old Camille Brennan, was arrested on two counts of narcotics distribution and two counts of delinquency of a minor after she gave some pot brownies to two of her female students. She works(ed) at Archbishop Hannan High School. Police and the school principal learned about this after one of the girls told them that night. 

Brennan admitted to doing this and resigned from her job. The principal Father Charles Latour wrote a letter to parents saying “The care and safety of your sons and daughters is a priority I hold sacred.” I wonder what made her think that this was a good idea, serving weed to her students. Either way her dumb ass now has a police record and her career ruined. Her lawyer said “At this time, my client has simply requested that we fully cooperate with our judicial system in every capacity.” I've never understand why people do things like this. To be cool? To try and relate to the youth? I couldn't imagine losing my job and going to jail over doing something this damned silly.

Father Shoots Son Over Orange Juice

The orange juice game in Louisiana is more real than I could imagine. 58 year old father Eldridge Dukes got into an argument with his 18 year old son after finding out that there was no more orange juice left. 

By the way, never fuck with someone named Eldridge. Its just one of those names that screams trouble. Anyhoot, he and his son got into a fight over this orange juice that was missing and the shouting escalated into a physical fight. I bet a nice cool glass of orange juice is good after a fight. The son broke a vase and after that all bets were off. 

Eldridge grabbed his handgun and chased his own son down the street firing three shots at him. The son was hit in the ass by one of the bullets but suffered no other serious injuries. Eldridge was arrested and charged with attempted manslaughter as well as the illegal use of a dangerous weapon. I have talked about stories where families fought over food before but I think this is the most extreme one. Its orange juice. Try explaining that in prison. No one sounds like a badass for shooting at their own son over juice. Liquor...maybe. But not juice.