Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Dante Learns The 7th Amendment


This is another one of those Amendments made because British rule was ridiculous. They were all like “I say, kind sir. Though shalt be rapped upon thine ears by our king!“ I mean, ours is at present but it isn’t as bad as they were doing it back in the day. Meaning in the grand scheme of things not all that long ago. There are people that can trace their family lineage back further than this country has been around.

“In suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise re-examined in any Court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.”

This pretty much means that if you are being tried in a civil trial that you have a right to a jury. There is too much emphasis on juries which as many of you know I don’t trust. You get a jury of people that are my true peers you should hurry up and capture them because they’re moments away from starting a riot. Also you cant be tried again for the same shit you got off for unless it is proven that the jury seriously fucked up.

The perfect jury.

It used to be that the suit had to involve a total of over $20 but due to inflation and the fact that courts would be overrun with a shit ton of trials it was raised to $75,000. This isn’t a particularly fun law. I mean, when the cops have me pinned to the ground giving me the good old fashioned “Welcome To Los Angeles!” I cant lay on the ground screaming “I plead the 7th!” or anything. And I think I’d get in trouble for handing them a twenty.

"Um-hmm. Yeah. They got Dante's dumb ass on the ground now."

Click here for previous Dante Learns The Amendments.

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