Rosscast Episode 207: Dante The Superior Entree

In this episode I bitch about rain, talk about my weekend and how I will spend my holidays, why not to date R&B singers, three books I read this week, a chick pissing in a grocery freezer, another one hiding pills in her draws, follow up to the Mitrice Richardson story from last year, and some listener questions from Josh Smith. Click here to download this and other Rosscast shows. Enjoy!

Rosscast Episode 120: Going Commercial!

Rosscast Episode 120

The Rosscast

In this episode I talk about cereal being way too damn expensive, homemade lotion being needed, commercial and product slogans being misleading or dangerous to our health, the last episode of Conan O'Brien, and the mayor and governer ruining Los Angeles. Click here to download the show or click here to subscribe and download through iTunes. Enjoy!

Video Blog 2 "Raining"

The Day Part 2

So me and Sam get there a few minutes late. If I had known how slow everyone there at the probation office fingerprinting place worked I would’ve gotten there by foot and still been on time. It made no sense. The rain had stopped and it was actually bright and sunny over there in Downey.

I walk in and sign in. There are a couple dudes there and the security guy flexing what little power he has by forcing people that have worked there for decades to sign in before he allows them inside. Assholes. I sit there until around 10am when someone finally drags their ass to the front desk to let us do what we came there to do. I head into the back and fill out some more forms.

The lady at the desk was so unhelpful and had the shittiest attitude. You have a job! Be happy! Live it or lie it! After over half an hour I had to head to another room and get fingerprinted. Now, me and this other dude chatted. I actually initiated it. Yay, me. He writes scripts and I gave him some tips. He thanked me and the lady started fingering me. Ew…

I swear she just learned how to do it. And just like I predicted, my long ass fingers made getting decent prints difficult. I was finally done after taking two minutes a finger, got my paper, and left. I went searching for Sam and couldn’t find him. He says he never moved. I don’t believe him. I went to a gas station and tried the pay phone but it just took what little change I own. I wanted to smash it. I turned and saw Sam heading into Carl’s Jr. and caught up to him inside. He asked if I was hungry. Just in case anyone is wondering; if you ask me if I’m hungry the answer is yes. I am out of work and survive off of Ramen and whatever leftovers I get. We ate and talked about comics and county jobs. We laughed at a 400lb security guard. I don’t like fat guards and cops. I always think that since they cant chase you they’re more likely to pop a cap in your ass.

Oh, I left out a part. When I went back inside the place to see if they had a pay phone I could use the guy said they did and for this big, Black, goofy looking chick that was security to let me in. She said:

“You done with ya business inside?”

“Yes.”

“Then I ain’t lettin’ you back in!”

Yeah, because since I just got fingerprinted, gave you my address, social security number, and all my background information, now is the time for me to wild out and strike at the government. Bitch. Just let me use the goddamn phone!

We eat and head back this way. We get to Meltdown, a comic shop on Sunset and look at random stuff and complain about how comics just aren’t all that great anymore. He invited me to a convention next month. I agreed and it should be fun. We came back to my place and I gave him my stories that we hope to publish in the coming months. I also told him that the two of us should draw three pictures each to take to the convention. He agreed. This should be cool.

Now, I am home and resting my poor legs. It wasn’t so bad overall. I got to see my sister and hang with a friend. I chatted with my mother for a bit and it actually wasn’t horrible. Maybe things will look up now. I got food in my belly, a roof over my head, and people that still love me. Now if only I hadn’t stepped in a huge puddle minutes after bragging to Camille that my shoes were water proof…

Rockets.

The Day Part 1

Another day another chance to get a job. Man, my legs are on fire from all the walking I did today. How was your day, folks? Its funny how people who have jobs treat others like shit. And then you have good people like my friends who go out of their way to help me out. In the course of this here blog I will show examples of these polar opposites. Let me crack my toes first. Oh, that’s nice…

I would love to say my day started off with me waking up all refreshed and feeling awesome. But that’s not how I roll. Some asshat called at 2am and woke me up. I had a hard enough time with shit on my mind getting to sleep. Whoever it was didn’t even leave a message. Jerks. It took me forever to finally get back to sleep and it seems that as soon as I did I had to wake up at 6am.

The plan was to head over Camille’s (my awesome little sister from a different mister) and get some money for the bus. Yes, its that bad now, people. Anyhoot, I got ready and looked outside to see the sky raining. Not regular ass L.A rain, but a tsunami of rain (as Cam puts it)! I was like, “Come on!” I left and realized I didn’t have my watch. I went back and started walking. 3 miles.

Oh, the rain! I had to dodge cars throwing water, the sky throwing water, and water throwing water. It was coming from everywhere. At least my socks were dry. For now. I finally made it over to her place and she gave me some tokens and I danced the dance of he who can now ride the bus to interviews without worrying how to get there. She’s great. She walked me outside and I continued my trek. I got to the bus stop and noticed a sign for the 750. What the fuck is a 750? I crossed to the 20 stop hoping the 720 stopped there. It didn’t. It flew by and I took the 20. I got to hear an interesting conversation on the way downtown. Let me transcribe it a bit for you. It was two older Black folks. A male and a female.

Man: “Why the fuck don’t you got yo card?! We could get some damned Vicadin if you did!”

Woman: “Fuck you! Why ain’t you got yo card?!”

Man: “I'm sittin’ here hurtin’ an’ that bitch at the center wont give me some goddamn pills! I’m hurtin’!”

Woman: “I know where to go.”

Man: “Where the stop?”

Woman: “Nigga, I told you I know where we get off!”

Man: “Don’t be yellin’ at me, bitch!”

Woman: “Here we are. Get up, nigga!”

So I get off at Hope and Wilshire. Now I got another walk on my hands. This one just over a mile. Its not raining now, thank God. I get there and cant find Sam. Yeah, Sam is giving me a ride to Downey to get fingerprinted for a County job. I spot him and we’re off. Yeah, we only have 20 minutes to get to Downey. Will we make it?

Rockets.