Five Things I Learned Before Elementary School

Preschool stinks. I know some of you went there or have kids that did or will be. But to me it was a strange place that removed children from spending more time with their parents like they should. This is coming from someone that does not plan on having kids ever and every woman I did (all two of them) didn't pan out. So this is the thoughts of someone that is childless and used to be a human of preschool age which means I am just the person to talk about this shit. In this Five Things I Learned Before Elementary School I'll discuss what pertains to me because this is my blog. Get your own blog, you loser. Oh, and I will be covering the rest of school as well. 

School Doesn't Sound Fun

When my brothers and cousins would get home from school they never looked like they had a good time. Well, the bad ones did because bad kids tend to enjoy school more than good ones. I would never hear stories about the fun things they learned in class or about a teacher that made them feel good. I'd just hear about how they wished they were doing what I was: staying home all day watching TV.

Hatering On Catering

There was this story on the news about having catering trucks pretty much banned from school campuses because kids are too goddamn fat. They will have to park at least 1,500 feet away from schools. Now this bothers me for multiple reasons. Mostly because not only are catering trucks friggin’ awesome but because if it weren’t for them I would have starved as a child. And been hungry at my brother's funeral. Seriously. I got a burger at his funeral. I was grieving, okay?! Don't judge me.

Tears are a great substitute for salt!

The school I went to from 4th to the beginning of 10th grade was Mid-City Alternative. During lunch time they had a catering truck that would arrive downhill and we would race to it to eat such delicious treats like Mucho Machos, burgers, fries, or big ass root beer sodas. If it wasn’t for the $1.25 ($3 on Fridays) I wouldn’t have eaten. Know why?

Rosscast Episode 139: "It's In Fucking Mississippi!"

Rosscast Episode 139

The Rosscast

In this episode I talk about The Hurt Locker still sucking, Dr. Drew being stalked, eating healthy, teachers boning students, David Letterman’s blackmailer getting sent to jail, hygiene, schools closing, being home schooled, lesbians shutting down proms, 911 calls, and Prius’ driving themselves. Click here to download the show or click here to subscribe through iTunes. Enjoy!

Rosscast Episode 73: Mid-City Reunion 2009!

In this episode I talk about my high school reunion! Been waiting for months and was not disappointed. I discuss meeting old friends, random folks I forgot about, and cheap ass people. Click this link for this and older episodes for download. Enjoy!

Rosscast Episode 71: Is Gay The New Nerd?

In this episode I welcomed not one, but two guests! Two former schoolmates, RJ and Julie, joined me for an episode of the Rosscast that was too damned fun. We talk about everything from school, community college, prison, the law, why I'll never be a dictator, and try to figure out what's the new nerd? Click this link to download this and older episodes. I wanna thank RJ and Julie for making this one of my favorite episodes to edit. Enjoy!

Rosscast Episode 57: Society's To Blame?

In this episode I talk about a goofy ass woman that decided to surgically change her eyes to blue, why people do crazy things because they don't like themselves, getting sent to the office, and what I would do if I were a drifter. Click this link to download this episode and others. Enjoy!

"Where Is My Mind...?"

So later today I am heading to a church counselor. This is the first time in years that I have gone to any form of counselor. In high school they sent me to counselors and they were a joke. To call them counselors is an insult to actual counselors.

I was at Fairfax less than a month when I was first sent to counseling. Now, I’m still not sure what set it off. Its not like I walked around staring at walls or threatened people. But there is something inside of me that either draws people towards me or pushes them away. Maybe one day I will find out or perhaps when I hopefully meet my Lord.

Now mind you, I arrived at Fairfax a month into the school year. I knew no one and didn’t really try. By the time I had left my other school I was alone. My friends had left. I would just listen to my Walkman and draw. I was fine with this routine. My plan after school by this point was no longer to go to college and study to be a brain surgeon or a marine biologist. I just wanted to drift.

One of the counselors was a group. It was called Impact. Hmm. Maybe that’s why I don’t like TNA Wrestling. Impact was for stoners, cutters, and miserable bastards in general. I was none of these things. I never went to Impact. I had photography with a son of a bitch teacher (Mr. Spitzer) that ran the program. He would send me to the office when I refused to go. Now that’s good teachin’! He also called me gay and said I had ADD.

The next was this lady Ms. Razi. This was one on one. I only went to her maybe three times before she had to leave because she got knocked up. She barely looked at me. All I recall from her is looking at the half top of her head wrap and her light colored skin. Our conversations went like this.

“How do you get along with your parents?”

“Not good. But I cant change them.”

“Yeah, you cant change them…”

That was how it was. I was glad when she left. This was a waste of time and I was at school to attempt to get an education. My next was another group. The Black Man’s Support Group. Out of all of these this was the one I hated the most. It was just nothing but being told how the White man was not gonna help me. Nothing constructive. Just being told that the White man would keep me down but not saying, “But don’t worry because the Black man will!” Its like someone telling you that you’re gonna be shot in the face later but not by who. The thing I hated was that I would be pulled out of Advance Physical Science (a senior class I fought to be allowed in!) every Wednesday for this shit. I would be all sweaty from volleyball and just sit there for the first fifteen minutes with my head down and a towel on my head. This went on until I was in the 11th grade and told everyone at the office that I refused to waste anymore time going there. One of the lady’s in the office was pissed by my comment because she ran that program along with this random ass Black guy.

I am hoping that today goes well. I have so much shit that I need to get out of me. No amount of story writing, drawing, article writing, or movie making can ever get all the shit crammed into my skull out. I need to dig even deeper. Maybe I wont like what they have to say and what I’ll have to hear, but I have to do something.

Right?

Rockets.