Saturday, March 7, 2009

Put 'Em On The Dash!!!

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KETTERING, Ohio – An Ohio mother spotted breast-feeding a youngster and talking on a phone while driving has pleaded not guilty to charges of child endangering and unlawful child restraint. Attorney Joseph Warden filed the plea Thursday in Kettering Municipal Court on behalf of 39-year-old Genine Compton of Kettering.

Police filed the misdemeanor charges after a motorist saw Compton on Feb. 26. Authorities used a license plate number to track her down.

Police say Compton told them she was breast-feeding and wouldn't let her child go hungry. Warden says he believes his client is not guilty. Police say the woman faces up to 180 days in jail and a $1,800 fine if convicted.

Just when you think parents couldn’t do anymore to make sure they make their children’s lives even harder. Or stranger. I’m not sure which yet. I get the whole idea of not letting her child go hungry. Sure. But she couldn’t pull over? She couldn’t wait until she got home? I doubt the kid would starve to death if he didn’t get some titty in his mouth right that minute.

This is one of those things that people get used to doing. Like, we all do dumb shit repeatedly. I have worn boxers while ironing and damn near steamed my weenie. This has happened more than three times. Shit, more than ten! This likely was not the first time she has done this. This is just the first time someone called her out on her bullshit. I have read in another article that this mom was on the cell phone as well. Talk about multitasking! I cant even piss and brush my teeth at the same time!

I find breasts feeding in public wrong anyway. Yes, I’m one of those guys. And don’t give me that crap about it being natural. As the great Al Bundy once said: “So is peeing, but you don’t see me doing it all over the place!” Leave it at home or in private.

I wonder if she will still think what she did is okay as she sits in jail for a while. Probably. Now she will have plenty of time to wonder about her kid and whose boob its sucking on.

Rockets.

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