I refuse to go back to sleep ever again.
Mr. Soot thought it would be funny to place another issue of
DC’s 52 on my face while I slept. There are a lot this week and some of them make me question the people in charge of decision making. Some of these characters just don’t deserve their own comics. Seriously. Were you clamoring for a
Black Hawks comic? Yeah. That’s what I thought. I’m getting ahead of myself.
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| Superman |
Everyone knows who
Superman is. He is the single most popular character ever created in comics and known around the world. He is literally the biggest super character in history. So I have to ask myself: Why did he get the crappiest issue one? I mean…wow. This is a real stinker. I cant imagine he is hard to write. He flies, shoots heat out his eyes, ice breath, super strong, and bad at disguise. Simple. So why the long boring ass introduction?
We get Superman sulking (
a new power apparently) because
The Daily Planet is demolished and a new one is built. They are also getting rid of the paper and going to TV and internet. He ends up fighting a fire creature. I hate fire creatures almost as much as I hate smoke monsters. He beats it after sending it into space. Later
Clark Kent goes by
Lois Lane’s place and she is sleeping with some other reporter. The issue ends with more sulking.
This issue was the one splashed across the TV, internet, and papers. So why did they make it the most boring ass one? I love reading but Jesus, this starts as being way too wordy. I don’t care about the history of The Daily Planet whatsoever. I almost stopped reading this one. It was just dull.
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| Teen Titans |
Does DC have a problem writing teams that don’t have the word “
Justice” or “
Suicide” in the front? There are a lot of teen
Metahumans floating around and jacking stuff up. This issue features
Kid Flash botching a burning building rescue. He isn’t likable like he is on the cartoon of the same name.
Red Robin has his home invaded and gets away by flying. When the hell did he get wings?!
Wonder Girl gets rescued by Red Robin after stealing a car and taking down a helicopter.
The issue ends with a tie in to the awesome
Superboy comic. Damn it! The story was way rushed and the art was strange. The teens looked like weird ass adults. For being so mart they have Red Robin (I hate that name) act more like Jason Todd in his recklessness. Wonder Girl, who hates that name, doesn't tell him what to call her instead. Kid Flash is a dick.
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| All Star Western |
Jonah Hex. Know him? I don’t either. He’s a cowboy with a scar. I know he had a movie I couldn’t watch for more than ten minutes. If this comic was a film I would have left the theater. In old
Gotham hookers are being killed. Hex and a dweeb go around trying to find information about the killer. What I mean by find information is Hex goes around beating people up and being an unlikable character. A hooker that gives him information dies and he sees that all the powerful men in Gotham have the same ring as the alleged killer. I just didn’t care for this issue. This didn’t sell me on Jonah Hex or make me care to figure out how it ends.
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| Black Hawks |
Bombs. Fighting. Biting. Secret agents. Cell phone cameras. Chick gets infected. There. That’s the entire issue. A bunch of characters that would be background victims get their own comic for some reason. DC, you cant have a cell phone picture ruin something that’s supposed to be super secret in two of your debuts (as they did in
Red Hood’s comic). This comic didn’t need to be written or drawn. Its just nonsense. DC cant afford to put crap like this out.
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