Wednesday, April 13, 2016

No Time To Explain: Burger King Window Smashing

There is this weird thing called “common sense” which isn't as common as it should be considering its name. A bunch of employees who should be reevaluating their schooling got a prank call saying that pressure was building up inside of their Burger King location and the only way to relieve this pressure was to smash out all the windows. So they did it. This took place in Coon Rapids, Minneapolis. Yes, that is a real name of a place. Hate to know the history of how that place got its name.

Anyhoot, someone claimed to be with the fire department and told them that the building would blow up if they didn't release the pressure building inside. The store manager and employees rushed out and started going Hulk Smash on the place. I'd like to think at least one employee stopped and thought “Hey, what if we just leave the doors open?” Fuck that, right?! No time to explain! Start kicking windows open now!

An employee named Ethan Grewe said in an interview “It's nothing I ever came across so I didn't know what to do. I guess I was a little scared. My other co-workers were doing it so I just followed along” Those are four of the most dangerous words in human existence. “I just followed along.” Police showed up and the manager was all a fright explaining to police what was happening. This is on video too if you wanna watch it. It turns out that this shit has happened before and very recently. The same shit happened in an Oklahoma Burger King the day before this saying there were high carbon monoxide levels and to smash things. Here in California there was one in February as well as in Tuscon, Arizona and a Wendy's in Phoenix. When I first heard this story I thought it was a late April's Fools joke. Then I hoped it was just fake. I refused to believe that someone could be this damned dumb. I was wrong.  

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