Shit Just Got Real 14

I have never understood crazy wedding proposals. I liked the idea of just being somewhere nice, like home, and perhaps with friends and family and proposing. Not at a sporting event, not in a restaurant, and definitely not underwater like Anthony Taylor did to his girlfriend Stephanie Walker. Before I go on with this story allow me to rant for a moment.

When guys propose to a chick and tell their friends their friends will ask “So, what did she say?” That's about it. When a woman accepts a proposal and tells her friends the friends ask “Let me see the ring!” and “How did he do it?!” I don't understand the importance of how a guy asked just as long as he did. Out of all the friends that I have that are married I only know the proposal story of one and the way it was done is totally acceptable to me. It was nice, simple, and sweet.

Now back to the story.

Anthony got the idea to propose to his girl while they were scuba diving. Already that's one strike. Going underwater and diving deep is just daring nature to consume you. Anyhoot, he whips out his little sign he made to propose to her underwater and of course she was very surprised by it. So surprised that she gasped. Underwater.

She just got real.

Thankfully a diving instructor was there to help and she didn't drown. She almost did but she didn't. Anthony was doing what he thought he should, which was an elaborate proposal, because that's what we hear you're supposed to do as a guy. If you just drop to your knee and tell a woman that you only want to have her vagina for the rest of your life until you're worm food that isn't good enough. You have to spend a lot of money or put a life in danger to have a story for your hopefully fiancee to tell her friends.

This is normal. Right?

I have been proposed to once but she was only 80% serious. I have been asked by a ex girlfriend how I felt about women proposing to men and I don't care. Especially since I am so slow with shit. I can wait months to kiss a girl. I dated one chick for four years and marriage was never even brought up. So if a chick was serious and asked me to marry her I wouldn't be all “I'm the man! That's my job!” Fuck it. Whatever. Propose to me if you're feeling brave. But make sure to get me a big ass ring.

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