Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Shit Just Got Real 13


In Iowa City the cops pulled 19 year old Quentrel J. Johnson over because of his name. I'm kidding but totally not at the exact same time. They say he was driving around with no headlights on around 5pm in the afternoon. The car smelled like weed because he's 19 and then the cops asked him to step out of his vehicle. When he did they noticed that his tongue and teeth were covered in weed.

The police checked him and he had a large bag of weed in his crotchal region which is usually the best place to hide drugs because cops never check there for drugs ever. The asshole is an even better place to hide things. He told the cops that, yes, he had been smoking weed (derp!) and then shit got real for young Quentrel.

While searching the car police found a prescription bottle of codeine with the label removed that he bought off someone and that he, shocker of all shockers, did not have a prescription for it. They also found a drink he had made using Sprite, lemonade, and codeine which is also known as gettin' his skrilla on. I think that's what the kids call it. Sizzurp! That's it! He also had $3,000 in cash on him that he says his mama gave him. That's nice.

He was arrested last June for possession of a controlled substance. Now he's been charged with the same damned thing, possession of a prescription drug while behind the wheel of a vehicle, aggravated misdemeanor obstruction of justice for eating the weed as well. Damn. He went for the gold! What ever happened to getting fucked up at home? When I drink at home I just want to stay at home and just enjoy being drunk. Why is it that people like to do drugs and go be social? Just stay at home. He couldn't wait to get high? I just don't get it.

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