Sunday, March 16, 2014

"Rehab: The Fake Tales of a Real Asshole" Scene 11


Sad Sack left the room after assaulting me. What kinda man touches another man's dick without giving him the chance to return the favor? I know how that sounds but I am in far too much pain to care right now. I try to sit up and a sound somewhere between a whimper and a belch escapes my lips. I think I'll lay here for a few more minutes. I close my eyes and someone knocks on the door frame.

“If you're here to punch my dick get in line” I say. A woman giggles. I look and its Boobs covering her mouth which doesn't help. She's with Inky, the chick with all those tattoos and half her head shaved. “Don't take offense, but I'm not physically capable of looking at a woman right now.”

“None taken” Inky says. “Looks like you've been through hell and back.”

“I'm not back just yet” I tell her. “I swear if I sneezed right now my dick would fall off.”

“TMI” Inky says. “How did you manage to piss so many people off so fast? It hasn't even been a week here.”

“It hasn't?!” I shout, sitting up. I immediately regret this decision and curl into a ball. “Did you know that my roommate rapes his wife?”

“No...” Inky says. “Is that why he's here? I'd think they'd let us know if a raper was here. Let's go tell security!” She and Boobs vanish from the door. I jump up to stop them and fall to the floor. My penis shouldn't control this much of my body. My mind, I'm fine with. I drag myself to the door by my elbows and try to scream for them to stop. I can't. I just drop my face to the floor and moan. The sound of something hitting the tile next to me gets my attention. I look up and its Beef. He dropped a slice of salami on the floor.

“Can you hand that to me?” he asks. I pick it up, give it to him, and he eats it without chewing. “Thanks.”

“Yeah” I said while rolling over to my stomach. I was hanging halfway out of my doorway now. “Where'd you get that from?”

“Mind your business” Beefs says and walks way. Well, walk is too strong of a term. He shifts away. I think I'll go to sleep. Now. Right here on the floor. I doubt I can make it to the bed. I must pass out for a minute because I am awakened by shouting. I open my eyes and Sad Sack is running down the hall towards me.

“You motherfucker!!!” he's roaring. Wonder why he's so mad.

Oh. Right. Rape.

Feets don't fail me now!

I manage to get to my feet just in time for Sad Sack to ram me so hard with his shoulder that I fly a room and a half down the hall. I hit the ground waiting to black out. I don't. Sad Sack lifts me by my collar and belt then launches me into the three security guards that were chasing him. Everyone is out of their rooms watching and cheering. Sad Sack sees Mr. W. Scott standing near the end of the hall and charges at him. He throws a wild right hook that Mr. W. Scott blocks with his elbow. He then jabs Sad Sack in the throat, pulls his body down by the neck connecting with a knee, and smacks him in the back of the head with his clipboard. Mr. W. Scott then does the pimpish shit I've ever seen.

He straightens his tie, marks off a box on his clipboard, and walks away.  

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