Dude, What The F**k?! 8

I saw this story the other day and was gonna write about it but then less than 24 hours the story is over. This guy named Michael Anthony Brown, 31, of North Carolina was being searched for because he was he figured that it was a fine idea to go on a toe licking spree in a local Walmart. He went there and lied saying that he was a podiatry student and a lady who obviously can't spot a pervert with a lame ass lie.

Brown started to help her with her shoes and then popped her foot into his mouth and started sucking on her toes. She got pissed at this freak and he offered to buy her groceries probably while she tried to wipe his nasty ass spit off her foot. She says that she believed that he was an employee of the store but if you look at the surveillance image that was taken of him there is nothing about that Cosby sweater that says “Ask me for help. I work here!” The victim also said that Brown started a conversation with her about shoes because women love shoes. Its science.

Look at him plotting some toe sucking.

It turns out that this guy has a history of perverse behavior going back to 2004 when he had to register as a sex offender for “attempted rape or attempted sex offense.” He is locked up on $50,000 bond and hopefully he stays there for a while because guys that lick feet uninvited are dangerous. Its fine if you are into sucking on foot fingers and whatever but you can't just run around doing it when you feel like it. And some random ass woman walking into a Walmart? Come on now!

They gonna have fun with them breasts...

I have wished that I was into feet before. I tend to give out so many damned foot rubs and it does nothing for it besides hopefully make someone else's foot not sore anymore. It does nothing for my wang whatsoever. Man, what a sweet fetish to have. You get off by looking at or touching feet? That's so easy! I like nice thighs. I can't run around offering thigh massages. Or can I...?

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