35 walked among the promenade watching
all of humanity summed up within a half mile radius. There were rich,
poor, loved, hated, lonely, popular, good, and bad. For a moment 35
wondered what they thought of him.
It does not matter.
“I know” 35 said. “Have you ever
heard of the Kansas City Shuffle?”
“What?” a beautiful woman said as
he passed her by. “What did you say to me?”
“No...nothing” 35 said. A large man
appeared behind 35. 35 did not need to turn around to see the man. 35
was aware of everything on such a small planet like Earth. He was
told before arriving that it was 1/35th the size of where he was
from. “I was talking to someone else.”
“Like me?” the large man asked. The
man reared back and punched 35 in the back of his head as hard as he
could. Of course there was no way that this man could know that 35
was not as average as he appeared. The young woman actually thought
that he was kind of cute. A moment later the man would know that
almost every bone in his hand was now shattered against the skull of
35. He was in far too much pain to scream, but if he could he would
have cursed the parents of 35 and everyone that ever knew him.
“Are you okay?” 35 asked. The man
began to crawl away as the woman screamed. 35 noticed more humans
looking his way. “Everything is...fine” he said. He knew this was
a phrase used to calm most of them down or some variation of it
throughout history.
“What did you do?!” the woman
shouted at him.
What is this Kansas City Shuffle?
“Deception” 35 said as he raised
his hands to the sky. Bright beams rose from his palms as those who
watched began to record him with their phones or run away.
The revolt is beginning.
“Not quite” 35 said.
What do you mean by not quite? Explain
yourself 35.
“I'm bringing California with me”
he replied.
Unacceptable.
35 ignored his orders as the ground
began to shake all around him. In the time he had been on this planet
he was very attached to this state. He found no harm in bringing it
back to his home planet.
Their species will not be able to
survive here.
“I'll figure it out” 35 said as the
sky began to open. A purple crack appeared in the clouds as many
began to shout for their own gods. 35 knew all of them by name or had
personally met them. It is well known that 26 claimed to be a god
that lived in a mountain that occupied the sky and threw lightning
from his hands. The idea was proposed that 35 attempt the same. 35
wanted to just come to Earth, send in his reports, and eventually
initiate the revolt of the stars.
If you do not stop immediately we will
be forced to send 36.
“Not until I'm finished” 35
groaned. All that were near could feel an invisible weight on their
shoulders and a popping in their ears that increased in pain. “Just
let me bring this with me. Please?”
Please?
“Yes...please?” 35 said. “For so
long I've been here and have done what you have told me with no
question.”
No question?
“Okay, fine!” 35 said. “A lot of
questions! But I have sent in my reports and learned so much from
this species. Just let me bring this with me!”
No.
“No 'maybe' or no 'ask later'?” 35
asked.
36.
The world froze in place. Screams were
silenced. The waves crashing against the shore hung in the air. Birds
were suspended as if on invisible wires. 36 had arrived. He arrived
rather quickly thanks to the crack in the sky 35 created with the
intentions of taking California with him. 36 landed in front of 35
and the world rippled for a moment.
“Greetings, 35” 36 said. He had yet
to choose a form and figured why waste the time. He was going to be
on this doomed planet for just a few short minutes. He appeared like
vitreous in your line of sight. If a human were to try and focus on
him it would be impossible.
“Go away” 35 replied. “I'll be
finished shortly.”
“You're finished now, 35.”
“Just a few minutes, 36!”
36 start initiati--
“.. …. .. ….... ….. . … ...”
35 said softly.
Repeat.
“You heard me” 35 hissed.
A moment.
“What did you just do?” 36 asked.
“You have no idea what you are asking for.”
“I know exactly what I'm asking for”
35 said. “More time.”
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