This weird bastard named Christopher
Nicholas Hiatt who is 34 going on 63 was arrested outside of place
called Pisser's Palace in Walkerville, Montana. That is a lot of bad
on one sentence. Hiatt called cops to report a theft when they
realized that there was a warrant out for his arrest. Hiatt is a man
that looks like he isn't the type to go quietly into the
night so of course he resisted arrest when they tried to handcuff
him. When they tried shoving him into the police car he licked the
eyeball of one of 'em. Ew! He is in jail on $45,000 bond and has been
hit with four charges including felony assault on a police officer as
well as assault with bodily fluid. There is a thing where folks like
to lick eyeballs but the amount of diseases you can cause doing it or
get having it done include styes, the clap, all the way to blindness.
Fuck all of that. If I were a cop and you licked my eye I would have
no choice but to beat you like a rug. But seriously. This guy is a
year younger than me.
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