Monday, May 5, 2014

Parents Failing Hard 13


A while back I wrote one of these blogs (click here for that) where I posted a bunch of pictures of mothers taking or being a part of pictures that were just so damned inappropriate. In each picture I would write down what you may see and I'd write down what I see, what you may have missed, and the impacts it'll have in society. Well, not really anything that deep. It just gives me a chance to look at these weird ass people and wonder why some folks bother to have kids.

What You See


Oh, look! There's a girl with her pants down. Yeah, look at them black draws. Sure, she's in the bathroom which is probably the least sexy room in the house, but whatever. Draws!

What Dante Sees


Okay. It is a safe assumption that she just got off the toilet. She is in the bathroom with her pants down. Oh, and a baby strapped to her chest! Was she using the bathroom with a baby strapped to her chest?! No child should have to endure such indignities. Maybe that baby carrier is too hard to remove and she just had to hurry up and take a picture! Either way, if someone sent me a picture like this I'd be damaged for a few days penile wise. Even if its cropped there's still a toilet seat. Stop it.

What You See


A young girl who seems really proud of her outfit. I think its for exercise or something. Its another bathroom shot but I can't see a toilet so that's a plus. But in the background something's amiss...

What Dante Sees


Is that a kid in the goddamn bathtub?! Kicking? Screaming for help possibly? So instead of bathing and/or watching the kid it is far more important to take a picture. Fuck waiting for the phone to fully charge! I need a picture of me now! I'm sure there are a lot of extra hours in the day where there isn't a kid in the tub where she could take this picture. Come on, ladies.

What You See


Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's this? Got a hot chick looking sexy with her thong. Nice. But there's one problem and I'm not talking about the dirty mirror.

What Dante Sees


Why is there a kid there admiring her ass?! Why? You take this picture, say to yourself “Damn it, kid. You're cockblocking me!” and get him out the room and try again. Why would you send anyone a picture like this? And where is his hand? Tell me, please! Again, can't crop this to make it sexy. Are people just closer to their kids than I think where doing something like this is cool with everyone? If I walked into a room and my mother was doing this I'd die. I'd actually just die right on the spot.

What You See


A couple taking a picture as they're captured in a loving embrace. Somebody is gettin' laid tonight!

What Dante Sees


Is that...is that a toddler taking the picture? Yes! A child in his diapers is taking a picture of his mother wearing a thong and a shirtless man. I know that isn't that kids dad. Father's don't hold their women that way. That is a side chick or booty call embrace. And get some framed pictures. Damned posters on the wall. And the Rolling Stones tattoo? You know better.

What You See


A young lady posing. She's doing that “pose” that girls do to impress other girls because no guy ever sees that pose and gets excited. Judging from the designs on the wall she seems very young (says the guy with a wall full of perler bead cartoon and video game characters). At least there's no kid involved.

What Dante Sees


But there is! Because she pregnant! She can't wait for the child to be born and strong enough to hold the camera for her. Don't know who this is but I bet you there are literally thousands of pictures just like this that were taken before, during, and after this kid was born.

Click here for previous Parents Failing Hard.

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