Five Things I Learned Working In Reality Television

From February of 2010 until December of 2013 I worked in reality television. I started off as a transcriber which is a job that I had no idea even existed until I got it. The job consisted of watching interviews that ranged from minutes to hours and writing down every single um, err..., and stammer that is used in shows. I eventually went on to logging, assistant editing, and even some story producing that I'll never be credited with. Hell, on one show I did something that I'm not even sure what the title could be called!

Reality television employs thousands of people yet you will always hear people talk about how it ruined television and is bad for the world. Oh, shut up. Its not all that bad. I've worked on six seasons of Hell's Kitchen, Marcel's Quantum Kitchen, Face Off, The Ultimate Gamer, Little People Big World, a show that never got picked up starring Jenny McCarthy, and The Glass House. Don't bother checking for me on IMDB because I filled out one part and said “Fuck it” because it takes too long. Between all of these shows I learned a shit ton of things but I'll only talk about a few in the Five Things I Learned Working In Reality Television.

1. Feast Or Famine

There are some shows you work on where the catering is the shit. I mean that in a good way. One one show there were gourmet catering trucks that came four times a week and a full buffet every single day. If you got there early enough someone would be there to prepare your meal for you! I ended up gaining almost 30 pounds in three months working on one show. On the other hand there are shows where you survive on Goldfish crackers and pretzels.

Most shows tend to have almost nothing but junk food so its a good idea to bring your own lunch. But remember to put your name on it unless you want people pilfering your shit. I had someone steal my wasabi one time even though it had my name on it and was hidden. Guess they really wanted that wasabi. I worked strange hours and don't drive so I was usually at the mercy of wherever I worked, especially when I worked hours like 7pm until 5am in areas where places closed at 9pm. This feast of famine also applies to your life outside of work. I went weeks without seeing friends or having the chance to talk to them because of my schedule.

2. Yay I'm Rich/Fuck I'm Poor

Reality television pays very well depending on what you do. I was paid more to type how people could not cook scallops properly than I was to move dead bodies in the hospital. I was able to stay fed, buy friends dinner and take them to movies, loan folks money, and pay my rent on time. It was awesome. Depending on what I was doing I had an entire months rent from a week of work. I also noticed that a lot of people have gambling issues so some would be anxious as all hell during pay check time.

On the other hand when you are in between jobs the chances of hunger are strong. You can work for eight months out of the year and if you did not plan properly starve for the other four. I tend to go back and forth with this. I'll take a month or two off and start looking for work only to realize that what is around I can't do/don't wanna do again. Then I end up transcribing from home and crawling back to it. I found that putting aside weeks of checks helped but only for so long.

3. People Can Be Weird

Now I get tagged with the being weird label all the time. But I am a friendly weirdo. Okay fine. I have the ability to be a friendly weirdo. But there have been countless times where I will be flat out ignored by people or looked at as if I farted on their keyboard. A lot of people have worked in reality television for so long that maybe their behavior seems totally normal to them. I will be with them in the kitchen and say good morning and they will look me up and down and then leave or just completely not acknowledge me. People get two chances to do this before I do the same to them. I have been in these situations at other jobs but it was usually because I made them look bad at their jobs or because they had some previous issue with my brother. In reality television this strange attitude is automatic. I laugh about it because chances are they will need me more than I need them.

At one job a guy ignored me all the time until he was told by a producer that Dante knew everything about the show. At the time I was logging, transcribing, doing art, story producing, learning the AVID editing program, and was on set once. I was doing two shows at once and knew every contestant, their attitude, and every situation that happened on and off camera. He walked up to me and introduced himself by calling me “Bro” which next to spitting in front of me or sneezing without covering your mouth one of the fastest ways to make me hate you. I knew every aspect of his job and knew that he was lazy as hell when it came to doing his job. He thought I just transcribed.

You will also meet some cool people. I don't want to make it seem like everyone in reality television is a dick. I have met some funny ass people that got me through working until dawn who were really interesting. Some editors would teach me cool shit without feeling threatened that I was gonna take their spot from them. Your reputation also follows you since reality television is a small world. There were jobs where I would hear about someone and work with them to realize everything I had heard was true good or bad. I had a reputation for being fast and saying no. 

4. Everyone Thinks They Have A Show

Once you tell someone that you work in reality television they will almost always say “They could make a show about my job!” No. No, they couldn't. You take that five minute period when a bee got into the store and everyone freaked out and try to stretch it into a 42 minute show. I couldn't really talk about what happened at work because it is always confidential so when I am at a gathering I can't talk about work. I sat in front of a computer all night listening to shouting and/or crying. Its not really a party topic.

These show have story producers. Their job is to take your boring ass day and make it interesting. Are these shows scripted? Yes, in that they have to give people something to do otherwise you're sitting there watching people stare at the wall. This has happened. On one show when there was nothing for the cast to do they would just sleep or stare into their own souls. That does not make good television. So if you think your job sitting behind the counter is fun just wait until episode three when they decide to let a bear loose in the store!

5. No One Goes To School To Work In Reality

When I had a chance to talk to people a lot of them would say that they went to school for film. I would ask them what if anything they made and many of them said nothing. They went to school to make a movie and had not done a single thing. There were explanations like “I don't have the money for the equipment” or “I don't have time for that.” Then they would ask me if I went to film school and I would say that I didn't. I wouldn't bring up the fact that I had filmed over 80 episodes of my own series, have hundreds of podcasts, and wrote over 2000 blogs and stories.

The strange schedules do make it hard to do stuff but there is always time. People who say they don't have time for things wake up 45 years old and wondering where the time went. If you work in reality television you have access to editing programs that cost thousands of dollars and you can find time (even after work) to use this for yourself. I suggest buying it for yourself when you have the money because staying after work for extra hours is just unhealthy on many social levels and when your life is at a point where you take social cues from me you need help.

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