Friday, April 10, 2015

So Apparently Flakka Is A Thing

Though I don't do the drugs I love hearing about the strange, new things that people are willing to inject, snort, or smoke to get high. A guy in Florida, 34 year old Matthew Kenney, was arrested after police found him naked and running from invisible people intent on murdering him. He had smoked a drug called flakka which I have never heard of. I remember when salvia was a thing. Then it was bath salts. Then krokodil. Now its this.

While running in traffic wearing nothing but a pair of shoes, he was caught by police and told them that he would “rather die than be caught by these unknown people” meaning the invisible people. By the way, this is actually how we would respond to people from the bible if they lived today. If someone told you a burning bush talked to them you would cross the street. Kenney also said that if he was hit by a car he would stop being chased. Technically that's true. He's been arrested a few times, three, since December. I did see a few mugshots for him when I looked for an image for this post. He's on a psych hold until they figure all this nonsense out which means he is probably already free as of the writing of this. Come on. He's been arrested three times in the last few months. 

Now for this flakka shit. It only costs about $5 to get your hands on some. The other street name for it is gravel. Neither of those names sound appealing. Its either a whack ass rapper or ground leavings. You can smoke it, snort it, shoot it up, or eat it. Its the perfect drug! Its been in Florida where they say in the last four years its use has increased by 780%. That's a lot. It causes sweating, hallucinations, violent behavior, and possibly death. Hell. That sounds like some folks Saturday nights after drinking too much.

What I don't get about these new drugs folks take and most in general is that they don't look fun. The idea of taking something that is gonna make me strip butt booty ass naked and run down the street wearing nothing but shoes does not make me go “Damn, I need to get my hands on some of that!” Plus, eventually you start to physically fall apart from these drugs. I'd have to weigh the consequences. If you told me there was a drug that made chicks touch my junk but my ear would fall off I'd hem and haw for a bit...then take the drug. But if street streaking is a side effect you can keep it.  

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